Dave's 101 Things

Emily asked me to post 101 things that most people probably don't know about me. Sorry all my posts are really long, but 101 things take up a lot of space, and I'll only mention Lost once.


1. I like to reference Seinfeld, and probably will several times in this post, as often as possible. In fact I made a Seinfeld reference in a work meeting yesterday.
2. When I drive with long pants on, or probably any sitting situation since I’m sitting right now, I like to pull up one pant leg.
3. I have to eat chocolate after every meal or I get the shakes.
4. I love reading while seated on the porcelain throne, but then again, who doesn’t?
5. I have an atrocious work ethic, I believe it’s only by the grace of God I’m still employed.
6. I’m probably a bit of a Socialist.
7. My favorite book (although it’s probably a novella) is The Old Man and the Sea.
8. I fall asleep on the couch every night and then transfer to my bed usually around 2:00 a.m.
9. I pee every night at around 2:00 a.m.
10. Other than family members I don’t think I have one true friend.
11. I don’t mind being a lone wolf.
12. One of my favorite words is juxtaposed.
13. I still spend far too much time daydreaming.
14. I love buying music even though we can’t really afford that luxury.
15. I was once involved in a life and death struggle with a hobo spider while naked.
16. I almost choked to death on a piece of ham and was saved by my father’s knowledge of and skill in the Heimlich maneuver.
17. I almost choked to death on an Excedrin and was saved by my ability to slam my stomach effectively against the counter.
18. I was suspended from BYU intramural basketball for fighting, and then was forced to endure an interrogation by BYU police.
19. I broke my hand punching the Plexiglas at 7 Peaks Ice Rink. Unfortunately this occurred
during a ward activity.
20. I watch a lot of TV (and before having kids, movies) but can’t accurately quote anything except Seinfeld.
21. Although I worry about my kids dying in some sort of accident I love it when they take physical risks. (e.g. Noah threw mykeys into our pool and when I turned around to locate them he jumped in without floaties, a life vest, or any idea how to swim.)
22. My favorite part of any Pixar film is in Toy Story 2 when Woody is rescuing Jessie from the airplane and he opens the hatch to jump out. Jessie asks "Are you sure?" and Woody responds with "No. Let’s Go." (I had to search for this scene to quote it properly, and it’s my
favorite.)
23. I’m embarrassed when people talk about me or praise me, but crave approval or validation.
24. I can’t lie (at least not without giving it away so please no direct questions).
25. I still regret walking away from a fight when I was 15, and if I could go back and change one thing in my life I would either beat the snot out of those two guys or die trying.
26. I like my 2 ½ hour commute because I can get so much reading done.
27. I’m a huge Utah Jazz fan and wish I could afford tickets every now and then (after sitting close to the floor with my brother-in-law I don’t think I could slum it up top unless it was a playoff game).
28. I’ve watched each episode of Lost at least 4 times.
29. I have asthma, but hate to admit this. It used to be because you can’t serve in the military if you have asthma, and now I don’t know why I hate to admit it.
30. I wish I would have done ROTC or Army Reserves and had Uncle Sam help foot my education bill.
31. If all obstacles were removed from my path I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up (based on my first 30 responses I probably should have pursued a career in boxing, or roamed the streets looking for people who need objects dislodged from their throats.)
32. I hate tooting my own horn, but I’m a pretty good home teacher
33. On a 5th grade over night field trip I got sick and pooped my pants a little bit and didn’t have a change of underwear.
34. I love the ocean but am terrified of sharks, so I don’t really miss it.
35. I really believe I’m going to die a violent death.
36. As you can probably guess, one of the things I daydream about is my own death.
37. I love getting up early in the morning and having the world to myself.
38. Emily hates this about me, but I refuse to file papers.
39. Although I never planned on staying, and still might not be here forever, I like living in Utah. (As a native Californian this is extremely difficult to admit.)
40. The movie Cinderella Man makes me cry like a baby.
41. I cry like a baby frequently.
42. I had to stop watching the Simpson’s because the character I identify with the most is stupid
Flanders and then the joke was on me.
43. I’m a horrific phone conversationalist and love every minute of it.
44. I don’t have a cell phone and never plan on having one, although Emily has one and sometimes I use it, so maybe I’m a hypocritical anti-cellite.
45. When I’m on a long car ride by myself out in the middle of nowhere and the only radio stations I can get are country stations—I listen.
46. I’m embarrassed to admit that one of my favorite moments with Isaac was when he
spontaneously started to sing a Flowbots song (No Handlebars) out in public.
47. With only 0.2 seconds on the clock I hit 2 free throws to send the BYU Division 4 Intramural Championship game into overtime which my team subsequently won. Keep in mind that as a freshman in high school I once went 1 for 11 from the free throw line.
48. I also really like the words subsequently, aforementioned, and loquacious.
49. I’m slowly trying to learn Spanish.
50. The one time I had sashimi the only thing I didn’t like was tuna.
51. I was a little jealous when Isaac started sleeping with his shirt off.
52. Sometimes I like to wrestle with my kids, not for fun, or bonding, but to firmly establish that I’m still the dominate male in the home (sort of like a feats of strength).
53. I really want to have another son (after that I could be finished having kids).
54. It’s took me 54 minutes to come up with 53 things about myself. All of this has been done "on-the-clock", but if those b@s$!#ds on the hill are going to make me work 4-10 hour days this is the type of work they’re going to get. (Please see number #5)
55. I eat about 5 meals a day and they’re not always that smal.l
56. I can’t enter numbers into the microwave that end in either 0 or 5.
57. My watch is 10 minutes fast, and has been as long as I can remember, but I’m too lazy to figure out how to change it.
58. I could watch Office Space (edited of course) every day for the next year and not get sick of it.
59. I’ll watch or read anything if it’s presented in a Top 5, Top 10, Top 20, or top any # format.
60. I just got back from my work cafeteria and chose a chef salad over a burger and fries.
61. A couple of months after getting back from my mission I bench pressed exactly 300 pounds.
62. I taught the first discussion to a Pentecostal congregation during one of their services.
63. I crave fish and chips fortnightly.
64. Somehow I’ve convinced myself that if my family had stayed in Vancouver I’d be in the NHL right now.
65. I think it’s ridiculous how much time presidential candidates spend discussing religion, they shouldn’t have to worry about getting the "Evangelical" or "Christian" vote. They should just be honest and get whatever votes they get.
66. I like to study maps.
67. I've loved every Pixar movie except Wall-E.
68. I still get excited for the start of high school football season, and plan on going to every Clearfield High School game this year.
69. I arrogantly think I know more about football than most people and unless I’m with family I’d rather watch a game by myself.
70. I’ve created a formula to predict the winners of high school football games and won a major award (t-shirt) 2 seasons ago and lost a tie breaker last year.
71. I once got into an argument with my girlfriend’s mom over grape juice. This argument occurred in front of her father and all her siblings too. Needless to say she (the mother) hated me. The girlfriend broke up with me within a month and moved home before finishing college within 6 months. I’d like to think that my love for grape juice made all of that possible.
72. Small metallic objects give me the willies.
73. I avoid verbal confrontations to a fault.
74. When I get really upset I black out.
75. I probably won’t write anything about Emily only because everyone else who's done this exercise has written really nice things about their spouses.
76. I’m compulsive about turning off lights that aren’t being used.
77. I wish I’d spent more time learning how to fix and repair things.
78. I like calling Emily "Sister Foley".
79. I clip my fingernails at least twice per week.
80. I feel guilty killing bugs.
81. I don’t think I have any hobbies.
82. I use excessive amounts of paper towels.
83. My hands and feet are always cold.
84. I love that when I lay down my kids think it’s an invitation for them to climb and jump on me.
85. I enjoy calculating confidence intervals.
86. Logistic regression is a beautiful thing.
87. I have one Eminem, and one Tupac song on my Ipod.
88. I still miss Morgan.
89. I’ve weighed as much as 240 pounds.
90. I still play video games (although only a couple of hours per month) and don’t foresee a future time in which I won’t play video games.
91. I think Noah has Emily’s eyes.
92. I read Stephen Hawking’s Brief History of Time and think at least half of what he says is just BS and he knows it.
93. I’m not that smart so I could be wrong about #92.
94. My high score in bowling is 201.
95. I’m reading the Old Testament right now and loving every minute of it.
96. My favorite talks in General Conference are almost always by Elder Holland, and I thought that long before I found out (a couple of weeks ago) that one of his talks helped convince Emily to marry me.
97. I was almost taken out by security when I tried to meet Elder Holland after a BYU devotional.
98. I have vivid dreams, and sometimes they’re revelatory in nature.
99. I really want to name one of my sons Daniel but Emily hates that name.
100. My favorite scripture just might be Isaiah 48:18.
101. My favorite thing about living in Clearfield is that you can walk around town in your pajamas and nobody bats an eye.